My Blog

1) BRAIN TUMOR:

Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.

Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)

Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you?

Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I’m dumb?

Doctor: Then why are you so happy?

Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!

2) MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL:

Teacher: What is 5 plus 4?

Mr. Bean: 9

Teacher: What is 4 plus 5?

Mr. Bean: Are you trying to fool me, you’ve just twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!

3) WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:

Mr. Bean: I’d like some vitamins for my grandson.

Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?

Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn’t know the alphabet yet!!

4) AT AN ATM MACHINE:

Friend: What are you looking at?

Mr. Bean: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.

Friend: Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?

Mr. Bean: four asterisks (****)!

5) Marriage:

Friend: How many women do you believe must a man marry?

Mr. Bean: 16

Friend: Why?

Mr. Bean: Because the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4worse.

6) CHATTING WITH HIS FRIEND:

Friend: How was the tape you borrowed from me, is it Ok?

Mr. Bean: What do you mean ok, I thought it’s a horror film. I didn’t see any picture.

Friend: What tape did you took anyway?

Mr. Bean: Head Cleaner.

7)DEATH OF HIS MOTHER:

Mr. Bean:(crying) the doctor called, Mom’s dead.

Friend: condolence, my friend.

(After 2 minutes) Mr. Bean cries even louder

Friend: what now?

Mr. Bean: my sister just called, her mom died too!

MR. BEAN ATTENDING A MEETING:

Colleague: Sorry I’m late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs because of a power failure.

Mr. Bean: That’s alright, me too…I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.

9) Spelling lesson:

Mr. Bean’s Son: Dad, what is the spelling of successful….is it one c or two c?

Mr. Bean: Make it three c to be sure!

Leo (24 Julai - 23 Ogos)
Orang nya: penyayang, warm hearted, tidak kedekut bila mahu berkongsi kesenangan dan kemewahan dengan org yg disayangi nya. Jejaka Leo ini juga seorg yg ambitious, self-centered tapi tak ego… (jejaka leo memang gitu).
Tips utk memikat: sebagai perempuan, harus lah menunjukkan kewanitaan yg selembut-lembut nya. Kena tahu bagaimana menilai dan menghargai setiap ciri dan kualiti ada pada jejaka leo.
WARNING

Virgo (24 Ogos - 23 September)
Orang nya: pemalu, tak pandai mengawal emosi, ceng’eng. Suka mencari perhatian dari perempuan.
Tips utk memikat: Lelaki Virgo suka yg pendiam, tak kecoh,sofisticated,simple, jgn banyak cakap..(cerewet pulak si virgo nie) So kenalah pandai menyerlahkan nilai2 kewanitaan,

gaya

yang manis, kelembutan dan tak lupa kesabaran..(virgo ceng’eng..kuat merajuk)
WARNING: Bilapergi dating, jgn pakai yg ter "over welming"..virgo ini gatal..(chicky duck) kalau dia over gatal, kasi jer flying kick sama dia.

Libra ( 24 Spetember - 23 Oktober)
Orang nya: cerewet, posessive, takes things lightly when comes to quarrel tapi jujur dlm segala hal
Tips utk memikat: Senang aje..Libra suka perempuan yg ceria, happy go lucky..SO be urself
WARNING: So bila nak date..makai lah make-up yg sederhana..tapi jgn lupa cover-up pimple jika ada..a big turn off for Libra pasal diorang ingat diorang nie semua hensem

Scorpio ( 24 Oktober - 23 November)
Orang nya: action serius, mudah cemburu, mood swing..
Tips utk memikat: Sentiasa menghargai nya..nak bergayutdi talifon berjam-jam pun takpe! janji dgn dia, kerana Scorpio ini macam Libra juga, posessive.
Tak suka berkongsi perempuan nya dgn org lain.
WARNING: Buat pilihan yg betol bila mahu memikat scorpio, kerana bila dah terjerat susah nak escape dari scorpio… (jgn kata guek tak kasi warning)

Sagitarius ( 23 November - 21 December)
Orang nya: Fu..yoh..siapa dpt memang untung… Sagitarius org nya happy aje..suka (bergembira tepok tangan sama2..la la la..) bawa partner jalan2..sort of adventurous
Tips utk memikat: Sentiasa ada

kan

plan bila nak keluar..tengok wayang ke? kanoeing ke? anything asal

kan

jgn membosan

kan

…
WARNING: Jgn "u plan..i plan lah"..’confirm tak ada plan’.

Capricon ( 22 December - 20 Januari)
Orang Nya: Egoistic, ada batu duduk di atas itu kepala, pendek kata Capricon seorg yg sukar nak meluah

kan

perasaannya. Jarang sekali anda akan mendengar dia melafazkan ‘cinta’ pada anda
Tips utk memikat: COOL aje sis..nak tekel mereka bukan mudah..jgn give in selalu..ajar sikit..mereka jual mahal..kita jual lagi mahal
WARNING: Macam layang2 putus tali..jual mahal..mahal jugak sis..jgn mahal sampai terputus tali..melepas lah kau nanti…

Aquarius ( 21 Januari - 19 Februari)
Orang Nya: Pijak semut tak mati..
Tips utk memikat: Kacang aje..sentiasa berpakaian cantik, glamer..comfirm dia sentiasa nak berkepit aje dgn u
WARNING: Lelaki Aquarius nie cepat bosan dgn org..so sbelum dia tinggal

kan

kita..kita blah dulu

Pisces (20 Februari - 20 Mac)
Orang Nya: Segak, bergaya, ngada-ngada, choosy..
Tips utk memikat: Kasi jer belacan…
WARNING: Diorang tak suka macam belacan!

Aries (21 Mac - 20 April)
Orang Nya: Anak mak! smart mamat. intelligent,
Tips utk memikat: Bagus utk minah2 tudung (NO OFFENCE) but its true..Jejaka Aries suka wanita yg sopan, tata-tertib..sebab nak bawa tunjuk mak so kena lah bawa balik yg bagus punya
WARNING: Jika anda betol anda rasa aries ini pilihan anda, pilih lah. Kalau tidak, jgn lah main-mainkan hatinya. Hati dah luka sukar nak dibaiki. Macam moto yang dah rosak, makan bulandi workshop baru baik.

Taurus (21 April - 21 Mei)
Orang nya: Mencabar. garang seperti singa, takut seperti tikus. Mereka tidak tetap dgn pendirian sendiri…
Tips utk memikat: Low profile sikit, mereka suka sesuatu yg mencabar, let him find out the real u..
WARNING: Kadang-kadang diorang suka buat kelakar seorang seorang… kesian takde orang lain layan…

Gemini (22 Mei - 21 Jun)
Orang nya: Gemok! egoistic, tak suka kalah. Kalau ada debate, jgn harap anda nak menang..dalam apa2 persoalan jua mereka ada aje alasan nya
Tipa utk memikat: Sabar aje lah..be patient. Sebagai perempuan, mengalah lah sikit..lambat laun hati nya akan lembut jugak..Lelaki Gemini nie suka pada perempuan yg lembut, hatinya akan lembut jua.
WARNING: Jgn bersikap terlalu kasar dgn nya..kalau dah tak tahan dgn mereka..blah aje jgn banyak cakap..mereka panas baran. Tak guna bertengkar anda tak akan menang punya pasal diorang nak menang jer.

Cancer ( 22 Jun - 23 Julai)
Orang nya: Segak,Step kaya, bermurah hati, suka menunjuk-nunjuk dengan kemewahan..tetapi mereka adalah sebalik nya..(berhati-hati ya)
Tips utk memikat: Jgn pulak anda pun nak step kaya… nanti habis duit dikebas.
WARNING: TOLONG Jgn terpedaya dgn kata manis nyer.. first first manis, kalau dah lama jadi masam.. kadang kadang jadi basi…

When you are together with that special someone, you pretend to ignore that person.
But when that special someone is not around, you might look around to find them.
At that moment, you are in love.

Although there is someone else who always makes you laugh,
your eyes and attention might go only to that special someone.
Then, you are in love.

Although that special someone was supposed to have called you long back, to let you know of their safe arrival,
your phone is quiet.
You are desperately waiting for the call!
At that moment, you are in love.

If you are much more excited for one short e-mail from
that special someone than other many long e-mails,
you are in love.

When you find yourself as one who cannot erase all the
messages in your answering machine because of one message
from that special someone, you are in love.

When you get a couple of free movie tickets, you would
not hesitate to think of that special someone.
Then, you are in love.

You keep telling yourself, "that special someone is just a friend", but you realize that you can not avoid that person’s special attraction. At that moment, you are in love.

While you are reading this page, if someone
appears in your mind,
then u are in love with that person.